Funnels are sexy in pitch decks.
Top. Middle. Bottom. Convert. Scale.
But here’s what they look like in real life:
- Traffic sources firing in 12 directions
- Disconnected landing pages built by interns
- A CRO test from 6 months ago still “running”
- Attribution models that tell five different truths
- A customer journey that looks more like a pinball machine than a path
If your funnel looks like a slide, but behaves like a maze—you’re not alone.
Why Most Funnels Break
Here’s the hard truth:
Funnels don’t break. They just reflect your internal chaos.
Here’s what we usually uncover:
- No one owns the whole customer journey. Teams own parts—but no one’s accountable for the full experience.
- CRO is an afterthought. It’s a reactive project, not an embedded habit.
- Middle-of-funnel is ignored. There’s no nurturing, no education, no storytelling—just a dead zone between the click and the ask.
And worst of all:
The offer isn’t strong enough to convert when attention is short.
The 4-Part Fix We Use With Brands at Chief of Chaos
1. Assign a Funnel Owner
Not a committee. One person. This person becomes obsessed with improving each stage—top, mid, and bottom.
2. Build a “Stoplight Funnel”
Audit your current customer journey with Red (broken), Yellow (inconsistent), Green (working) markers. Fix red first.
No overhauls—just realignment.
3. Craft a No-Brainer Offer
If your ad to landing page conversion is under 1.5%, it’s not a channel problem.
It’s an offer problem. Fix the value prop.
4. Layer in a Mid-Funnel Magnet
Guides, quizzes, demos, calculators—something that builds belief between click and close.
Funnels don’t just convert. They educate. They filter. They qualify.
Your Weekly Chaos Challenge
Pull your full-funnel journey.
Ask: Where are people dropping off, and why would I stay at this point in the process?
If you can’t answer it, neither can your customers.
Want My Stoplight Funnel Template?
This is the tool we use to rapidly identify and prioritize funnel gaps across landing pages, media, email, and upsells.
DM me or drop “Stoplight” in the comments and I’ll send it over.
Until next time—
Funnels don’t fix themselves. Growth leaders do.
—Matt Frary
